But what do we say to the kids?...

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I'm having a little bit of a conundrum, or something of some such. For those out there who have undergone transplant, and had small children (when I say small, I mean under the age of 12 yrs old), what did you say to them? I've been using the 'don't ask, don't tell' method and it is proving to be a MASSIVE FAILURE! I think when my 'big day' comes, and I'm going to have to go under the knife, I do want to see him when I wake up, I do want to see his little smiling face, just in case, you know?
However, my child is a worrier. Just like his mommy! I was hospitalized in February, and I don't exactly remember how he found out that I was in the hospital, but he did. And I got a phone call, from my cellular phone, in my hospital bed, from my child's Guidance Counselor telling me that my son was vacant in school today. Vacant in the sense that he was clearly there, but not there. He was very empty and sad...and even in the over-crowded NYC Public Schools (where their can be up to 40 children per classroom), his teacher noticed this and pulled his aside to ask him what was wrong. He told her "I'm sad because my mommy is in the hospital because her heart hurts". Of course, as any parent would, hearing this tore me to shreds. I was actually being hospitalized for Ascites & chest pains, this is what gave him the idea that my 'heart hurts', since he clearly already sees my big belly, and to him, for now, that's almost normal to him. It's become normal to me, it's a part of my life I cannot change. I've learned to simply live around it, stretch my back when it hurts like hell, wear clothing that's not tight like I used to like to wear. I call them my 'tummy illusion' outfits! And my closet is full of them! Being a 30 year old female isn't easy with Cirrhosis. I'm not, I guess, what you would call the 'typical' Cirrhotic. By 'typical' I mean, statistically, Cirrhotic's are male, over 40. So, this has been a particular blow on my ego! I don't mean to sound shallow, but I've almost grown accustomed to people telling me that I'm pretty--it's also annoying, when egotistical-males whistle at you walking down the street--but, to be honest (like I always do here!), I kind of miss that.  I've always took pride in my looks, grateful in the fact that by just rolling out of bed, I don't need a lot of make-up, just a little lip gloss, sometimes not even, and people would STILL say that I was pretty. I'm not going to be pretty anymore...or at least that's how I feel. I feel like I'm going to be a freak with a freakish scar trailing accross my body, never living the way I was, never being the same, and lately, I have asked myself: What kind of quality of life will I have after Transplant? Do I want that kind of life?'
Well, I know I've now strayed off the beaten path (lol) of the title of this particular page, so I will get back to what I wish from all of you.
I feel like my child is going to see me and completely freak out, get depressed, flunk school, all of the things that I, too, went through as a child seeing one of my parents die. Which, either way you look at it, in a small way, or a big way, a part of me is going to die once I get my Transplant, and I don't want it to, but, hey, that's the price tag for living, isn't it? Maybe I'm expecting the worse out of all of this...maybe my 'pessimistic negitivity' is clouding my better judgment. I don't want to have my son find out about all of this like I did...like BAM ...this is what's happening to you, like it or not! So, I now ask all of you, I rephrase my previous statement, and I am asking EVERY parent out there, Transplant patient or not; How would you 'break this' news to your Child? Thanks for listening, your opinion matters to me! Till Next Time...